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Dear Mr. Claus,
You have been more than kind to me the past few years. But it would be fantastic if you could crank up that rosy-cheeked charm of yours and convince a desperate GM to trade me one more stay-at-home defenceman to go along with all these elite scorers I have. If we can buckle down and get into the top 10 in goals allowed (we’re 14th now), I think we could have a shot to win it all this year.
Good tidings,
Jim Nill
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Hey Santa,
Life in the nation’s capital is going swell. We’re winning a bunch of games — seven of our last eight, in fact. I don’t want to sound picky, but this three-on-three overtime is kinda cramping my style a wee bit. If you give us more shootouts (we’ve only had two all year!), I think I could really flex my best skill.
Hugs and puppies,
T.J. Oshie
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More goals would be nice. If not, we’ll deal with it. Find a way.
– D. Sutter
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Dear Santa,
Small request. That Gordie lives forever.
Love,
Detroit
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Dear Santa,
Travis Hamonic is a good defenceman and a great kid. Even though I’m trying to trade without much leverage here, it would be a Christmas miracle if I could get exactly the same player in return. Hey, it’s the least you can do for a guy named Snow, right. Ho-ho!
Your pal,
Garth
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Bonjour Santa,
Thank you for delivering Mr. Condon early this year. I realize we won’t be getting Carey Price back until the new year, and that’s OK. Belated gifts are cool, too. But if you could find it in your heart to keep sprinkling mediocrity dust on the rest of the Atlantic Division in the meantime, that would be magnifique.
Joyeux Noel,
Ginette Reno
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Dear Santa,
Did you see we signed eight-year-old Kayleigh Petersen to a one-day contract last week? Made that little girl’s wish come true. That oughta get us on your “Nice” list, no? Now, how about we quit teasing good hockey men like Alain Vigneault and Henrik Lundqvist and give them a big dose of Christmas in June.
Happy Holidays,
Jeff Gorton
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Dear Santa,
If you could subtly remind everyone that I’m out-scoring Brandon Saad this year, that would be a good look.
Cheers,
Artem Anisimov
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Santa,
My super season is kinda flying under the radar here. I’m nearly a point per game (27 in 28). A spot on Team USA’s World Cup roster would do wonders for my reputation.
Intensely yours,
Bobby Ryan
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Hey Santa,
Who is Brandon Prust? And why does his opinion matter?
Naughty-lister since ’08,
Brad Marchand
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Hi Santa,
I realize I let my emotions get the best of me when Hitch pulled me during Saturday’s debacle against the Maple Leafs. It’s just… they’re trying to lose this year and we’re trying to win. Anyway, I’ve cooled down, so if I could still keep getting the majority of the Blues’ starts, that would be awesome.
Thanks,
Jake Allen
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Dear Santa,
Maybe this is some sort of cruel joke. I feel as if I gave my buddy Thomas Vanek my scoring touch this year or something. Surely there is more to go around. I’m a seven-time 20-goal guy, and the puck just won’t go in. I might not get in the double digits this year!
Help,
Jason Pominville
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Dear Santa,
A prospective owner would be nice.
Your pal,
Mario
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Dear Santa,
All I want is to wait till the 11th hour of Trade Deadline Day, swoop in and steal Eric Staal from the Hurricanes for, oh, I dunno, a pair of third-rounders.
Best wishes,
David Poile
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Big Guy,
I know I only have four goals all season, but a four-goal night would be hilarious way to toast the holidays.
— Jumbo
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Dear Santa,
We truly are a team on the rise, but to make a real shot at a playoff spot in the Atlantic, we need all our play-makers — Jaromir Jagr, Nick Bjugstad, Aleksander Barkov — healthy for the bulk of our remaining games. We’re just not deep enough to win consistently otherwise.
Health means happiness,
Gerard Gallant
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Bonsoir, Santa!
Please tell all the annoying number-crunchers and Christmas carolers that I can’t hear them because I have my Stanley Cup rings plugging my ears.
Merci,
Patty
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OK Santa,
Here’s what I need you to do. Talk to the Ghost of Christmas Future. Get him to appear in the dreams of Palat, Johnson, Bishop, Hedman, Stamkos and Kucherov and show them how we will win five Stanley Cups if they all take discounts on their next contracts. That’s doable, right?
Forever grateful,
Stevie Y.
P.S. If you could delete Stamkos’s Twitter account, that would be a bonus.
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Dear Santa,
For Christmas, we would really appreciate some clarity on the futures of Dustin Byfuglien, Jacob Trouba and captain Andrew Ladd. Seriously. We have no clue how this is going to shake out and are slowly starting to panic.
Your comrades in cold climes,
Winnipeg Jets fans
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Dear Santa,
If you could drop a lump of coal in the stocking of every pre-season prognosticator who picked us to finished last in the Metropolitan Division, that would be sweet.
Egg nog and candy canes,
Mike Cammalleri, Third Star of the Week
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Hey ya, Santa,
You’ve been so kind to me over the years, but can you ask your elves to cobble together a winning streak for us that’s longer than three games? I wouldn’t mind a good night’s sleep.
Thanks in advance,
Bruce Boudreau
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Nick!
Same thing I ask for every year: Truculence.
B.B.
P.S. – I threw down the trade freeze two months earlier than usual just to get in your good books.
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Dear Santa,
How ’bout this? If we’re playing meaningful games in March, you can have our next first-round pick.
Deck the Halls,
Peter Chiarelli
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Dear Santa,
We want our beards back. I’m sure you feel our pain.
Signed,
12 Anonymous Maple Leafs
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Dear Santa,
Can we live in a world where people take their extra spending money and put it towards something useful (charity, education, Baileys) instead of giving it to multi-millionaire Brandon Prust so he can spear Brad Marchand in the jock for free?
Sincerely,
Common Sense
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Look, Santa,
With so many D-men injured or suspended, I have one shot, one opportunity to seize everything I ever wanted in one moment. I want to capture it, not just let it slip.
Recently recalled,
Andrew MacDonald
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Dear Santa Claus,
All we ask for is a city that wants to hold us close and never let go.
Love,
The Coyotes
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Dear Santa,
You’re magical. Can you whip up a time machine so we can hire John Tortorella a couple months AFTER the Board of Governors changed the executive compensation rule. Torts is good, just not second-round-draft-pick good, if you know what I mean.
Make ‘er happen,
Jarmo
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Dear Santa,
No more Red Ryder B.B. guns, please. I get it. I look like Ralphie from “A Christmas Story.” Joke’s over.
Best,
Tim Murray
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Dear Santa,
Send help.
Sooner the better,
Carolina Hurricanes
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